Mark Twain - SimplyNeo Quotes

"Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see." - Mark Twain quotes, inspirational quotes, motivational quotes

" The perfection of wisdom, and the end of true philosophy is to proportion our wants to our possessions, our ambitions to our capacities, we will then be a happy and a virtuous people."

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" Adam and Eve had many advantages, but the principal one was, that they escaped teething.
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" After all these years, I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning; it is better to live outside the Garden with her than inside it without her."

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" The government is merely a servant -- merely a temporary servant; it cannot be its prerogative to determine what is right and what is wrong, and decide who is a patriot and who isn't. Its function is to obey orders, not originate them."

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" I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position."

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" Let us swear while we may, for in Heaven it will not be allowed."

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" Whoever is happy will make others happy, too."

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" Always tell the truth. That way, you don't have to remember what you said."

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" A thing long expected takes the form of the unexpected when at last it comes."

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" There are basically two types of people. People who accomplish things, and people who claim to have accomplished things. The first group is less crowded."

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" Travel has no longer any charm for me. I have seen all the foreign countries I want to except heaven & hell & I have only a vague curiosity about one of those."

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" The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopts them."

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" When in doubt, tell the truth."

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" Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get."

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" Always do right--this will gratify some and astonish the rest.

message to Young People's Society, Greenpoint Presbyterian Church, Brooklyn, New York, February 16, 1901

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" Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company."

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" Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."

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" I did not attend his funeral; but I wrote a nice letter saying I approved of it."

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" It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have these three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence to practice neither."

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" In religion and politics people's beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second-hand, and without examination, from authorities who have not themselves examined the questions at issue but have taken them at second-hand from other non-examiners, whose opinions about them were not worth a brass farthing.

Autobiography, 1959

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" A historian who would convey the truth must lie. Often he must enlarge the truth by diameters, otherwise his reader would not be able to see it."

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" We adore titles and heredities in our hearts and ridicule them with our mouths. This is our democratic privilege."

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" Each man must for himself alone decide what is right and what is wrong, which course is patriotic and which isn't. You cannot shirk this and be a man. To decide against your conviction is to be an unqualified and excusable traitor, both to yourself and to your country, let me label you as they may."

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" The holy passion of friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money."

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Friendship Life Quotes

" Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more."

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" Peace by persuasion has a pleasant sound, but I think we should not be able to work it. We should have to tame the human race first, and history seems to show that that cannot be done."

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"December is the toughest month of the year. Others are July, January, September, Aprll, November, May, March, June, October, August, and February."

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Meme/Funny Quote

" The political and commercial morals of the United States are not merely food for laughter, they are an entire banquet."

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" The inventor of their heaven empties into it all the nations of the earth, in one common jumble. All are on an equality absolute, no one of them ranking another; they have to be "brothers"; they have to mix together, pray together, harp together, hosannah together--whites, niggers, Jews, everybody--there's no distinction. Here in the earth all nations hate each other, and every one of them hates the Jew. Yet every pious person adores that heaven and wants to get into it. He really does. And when he is in a holy rapture he thinks he thinks that if he were only there he would take all the populace to his heart, and hug, and hug, and hug! "

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