Mark Twain - SimplyNeo Quotes

"Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see." - Mark Twain quotes, inspirational quotes, motivational quotes

" Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination."

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" I notice that you use plain, simple language, short words and brief sentences. That is the way to write English - it is the modern way and the best way. Stick to it; don't let fluff and flowers and verbosity creep in. When you catch an adjective, kill it. No, I don't mean utterly, but kill most of them - then the rest will be valuable. They weaken when they are close together. They give strength when they are wide apart. An adjective habit, or a wordy, diffuse, flowery habit, once fastened upon a person, is as hard to get rid of as any other vice."

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" Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry."

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" Many public-school children seem to know only two dates--1492 and 4th of July; and as a rule they don't know what happened on either occasion."

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" It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."

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" Happiness is a Swedish sunset -- it is there for all, but most of us look the other way and lose it."

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" To arrive at a just estimate of a renowned man's character one must judge it by the standards of his time, not ours."

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" Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century."

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Love Quotes Women

" All schools, all colleges, have two great functions: to confer, and to conceal, valuable knowledge. The theological knowledge which they conceal cannot justly be regarded as less valuable than that which they reveal. That is, when a man is buying a basket of strawberries it can profit him to know that the bottom half of it is rotten."

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" Truth is mighty and will prevail. There is nothing the matter with this, except that it ain't so."

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" The perfection of wisdom, and the end of true philosophy is to proportion our wants to our possessions, our ambitions to our capacities, we will then be a happy and a virtuous people."

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" Adam and Eve had many advantages, but the principal one was, that they escaped teething.
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" After all these years, I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning; it is better to live outside the Garden with her than inside it without her."

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" The government is merely a servant -- merely a temporary servant; it cannot be its prerogative to determine what is right and what is wrong, and decide who is a patriot and who isn't. Its function is to obey orders, not originate them."

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" I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position."

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" Let us swear while we may, for in Heaven it will not be allowed."

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" Whoever is happy will make others happy, too."

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" Always tell the truth. That way, you don't have to remember what you said."

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" A thing long expected takes the form of the unexpected when at last it comes."

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" There are basically two types of people. People who accomplish things, and people who claim to have accomplished things. The first group is less crowded."

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" Travel has no longer any charm for me. I have seen all the foreign countries I want to except heaven & hell & I have only a vague curiosity about one of those."

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" The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopts them."

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" When in doubt, tell the truth."

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" Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get."

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" Always do right--this will gratify some and astonish the rest.

message to Young People's Society, Greenpoint Presbyterian Church, Brooklyn, New York, February 16, 1901

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" Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company."

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" Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."

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" I did not attend his funeral; but I wrote a nice letter saying I approved of it."

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" It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have these three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence to practice neither."

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